Fruit of The Loom Ninja

As I get older in life certain things people do, strike me as weird or funny. There is one person in my life however that I find to be weird and funny and that would be my Dad. When you combine weird and funny it provides for some interesting situations.


Case in point. The time my Dad decides he was going to show my brother in law and I some karate moves. On the surface there is absolutely nothing funny about this, but when I tell you he is in nothing but a white under shirt and his fruit of the loom briefs, it becomes a little disturbing and funny.

For some reason he felt it was time to share his experiences in the world of martial arts. I have no memory of anything he told us. The only thing that I remember is that I was completely scared that one of his pieces of equipment was going to fall out while he was showing us a high kick. The good thing is that he is an old man and his high kick is more of a thigh kick. Thank God, or I might have needed therapy after this lesson.

The lesson lasted about 30 minutes. Finally after getting tired of being put in arm bars and choke locks by a half naked old man, I told him to go to bed, or put his gosh dang pants on. You shouldn’t have to tell a man to put his pants!! You defiantly shouldn’t have to tell him twice.

After explaining to the old man that I no longer wanted to see a Steven Seagal arm bar from a half naked man, he decided that my brother in law and I were not yet worthy to learn the ways of the Fruit of The Loom Ninja. He proceeded to defile the fruit of the looms, by dropping a bomb in them that Franklin D. Roosevelt would have been proud of, while walking to his bedroom.

Just another eventful day in the life of one Duard “W.”Rutledge.